Woolman with Batman and Robin

2 sleeps until the trip

counting down .....

Update on Wayno (your not Elvis Bro) Josh

And again last night Wayno got up to his old tricks trying to take over the mic at some karaoke

session 

As usual he was escorted from the venue by a kiwi bouncer after he tortured the poor fellows ears with a cheesy Elvis song

Escorted out

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At the same joint Tony (im not Bono) Knocker finds his twin brother

Wayno (Your Not Elvis Bro) Josh

Wayne loved nothing more than to go down the local in Ol’ Blighty and sinking a few warm ones with the ‘guv. But when Wayne had a few too many, he would grab a karaoke mike and blurt out old Elvis numbers. Soon Wayne was kicked out of the pub. ‘I’m going to the pub up the road you pack of big manly pratts’ said Wayne. Hey bro, you’re beached as’ said the bouncer. Wayne thought ‘weird fucked up accent’ and off Wayne went. Soon enough, Wayne / Karaoke / Elvis is banned by bouncers from another pub. ‘Cheers Bro’ said the bouncer. Wayne thought ‘is the same weird fucked up accent again’? Eventually banned from all the pubs in London, Wayne moved to Australia to sing Elvis.

But Wayne stuffed up…the same bouncers were in Australia. ‘We’re Maoris’ bro, and our people hate Elvis bro. You’ll never sing Elvis in any pub in the world bro, while a Maori is on the door bro’. Wayne researched this problem on Google, and found out that it’s true, Maoris are on the door of every pub in the world. Wayne also realised all Maori bouncers are trained in the NZ School of Bouncometry in New Zealand!

‘I’m going to NZ to close down that school, or I’ll never be able to sing cheesy Elvis numbers in the pub again’!             

Peter (Putcha) Frampton

Peter (Putcha) – Peter grew up on a farm in Moree, far Northern NSW. While Peter was young, his parents made Peter plant seeds all over the farm. Peter soon learnt that planting seeds was a great way to show where you had been. He loved planting seeds in fertile, native soil more than anything, ever.

As soon as Peter was an adolescent, he fell for a beautiful aboriginal girl, and found a new way to plant his seeds, that was much more fun than planting in soil. Peter wanted to plant more seeds, it became an obsession…As soon as Peter was old enough, he left Moree and began to travel. And travel Peter did, not to your normal touristy destinations like Disneyland, but to far off destinations like Arizona, where Native American women roam, and Alaska, where the indigenous Inuit tribe still travel by husky by day, but snuggle in Igloos at night. Peter spent the next 20 years planting his seed all over the world, meeting and befriending indigenous people, to fulfill that one sick obsession. Peter thought his visit to Papua New Guinea, where he fell for a gorgeous 3 foot Mud Mask Tribeswoman, would be his last and headed home. On arriving back in Moree, Peter realised he missed one proud people…the New Zealand Maoris! How could he forget, after travelling around the world, NZ is so close, yet so far. To fulfil his childhood dream of planting seeds in native, fertile soil all over the world, it would never be complete without a seed in the great people of NZ…’I must go, I must go to NZ!’             

Mark ( I love Lanolin and wool ) Komene

Mark (Swivel Hips) – When Mark was much younger, he recalls a ‘wee stop’ at a bakery in Goulburn, during a road trip to Canberra with his family. After relieving and tucking away his well oversized love slug, something caught Mark’s eye…he could see a tall, proud, beautiful creature from the trough window.  It was ‘The Big Marino’, Mark thought it was the most wonderful thing he’d ever seen. Suddenly feelings he’d never felt before began overwhelming him. Standing at the trough, Mark let out a primitive, guttural groan of desire…his brother thumped him good, and Mark got back in the car…but this experience left a mark on Mark…why did the big sexy sheep (with the cute little arse) make him feel this way, why doesn’t he know where he’s from, why is pure wool so much nicer to wear than cotton, why does Mark dress lamb roast in a g-string, why has this curse been thrust upon him, why is Mark sooooooo good looking, why, why, WHY!!!      

Mark grew up, but the experience never left him. Bouncing from relationships with models, to one night stands with movie stars, he still hadn’t found what he’s been looking for.

During a recent business trip to New Zealand...Mark’s feelings began to grow he found out the truth. Mark was a descendant of a maori chief, and these desires he had felt toward wool is a part of his DNA…Mark had to get back there, but HOW?  A sly plan is hatched, with the random excuse of a Rugby World Cup…Mark begins organising…people believe this is a boys road trip…for Mark…it’s a homecoming!

TONY (im not Bono) Knocker

Tony (Token Irishman…everyone’s got one) – Since the age of 4, Tony was blessed with the voice of an angel. He could sing for hours upon hours in his little Irish hamlet of Kickafuckenlepricorn. At school concerts or at the local Gaelic club, people would melt at the sound of Tony’s voice.

When he turned 17, Tony thought he could use his gift for financial gain, so he auditioned for a rock band. The 3 band members, Larry, Adam and Dave thought Tony had the most perfectly pitched voice they had ever heard…and Tony became the first lead singer of U2.

1 minute after getting the gig, the band told Tony he must be known as Bono. ‘Bono?’ screamed Tony, ‘I want the world to know me as Tonsil Tickler Tony, you can jam the name Bono up your collective pikey asses’, and Tony walked out. ‘I’m gonna be someone, and you fuckers are going nowhere’ screamed Tony on his way out. The subsequent success of U2 and their second choice ‘Bono’ left Tony empty…he will forever hold a deep seeded vendetta against those 4 Dublin pikeys…

One day, Tony heard U2 are playing at the closing ceremony of the Rugby World Cup…but how do I get there? Tony’s mate, Josho, was heading over to the Cup with 2 other fellas, Tony could jump on the back of this? I’ll pretend I’m going to the rugby, but really I;’m going to shame those U2 pikey fuckers…

The human catapiller



Gunigoogoo

Tony..you're only here cause we needed a token Irishman...otherwise we'd fuck you off...

I googled the word sheep shagger and look who came up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



FOUR GUYS ONE CUP (NZRWC-2011)

KOMENE ROAD TRIP